Late last night and this morning I was peeing blood, and BOY was I freaked out! Called the doc today and of course my male doctor who I love and trust was out and a woman doc was there. First words out of her month, of course after "is there any discharge from your penis", was "you have a problem with a woman doctor?". Dilemma with a capital "D"! Of course I said "No, not at all", but I had to admit I was a bit nervous. I know...I know...I consider myself an evolved man, but I still get a bit out of sorts when faced with a woman doctor and even a therapist. I have NO problem believing that woman can do these jobs as well as men. That's not it at all. What is it?....Is there anything wrong with wanting the same gender when it comes to your innermost feelings and body parts?.... Why do I feel more relaxed with such? Isn't there just a feeling of gender specific understanding that we all want when we feel vulnerable, like at the doctor?
So...being as I have absolutely NO traffic on my site, how about some people chiming in on this dilemma. It's not that I didn't do fine with the woman doc, I just could not relax like I wanted to. What do you think? Is there some things that will always be gender specific?
Oh...by the way...I have a urinary/bladder infection. At least that is the consensus prior to the urine analysis. Of course when I called into work and a female coworker answered and said, "men don't get those, do they?"
Wednesday, November 15, 2006
Monday, November 06, 2006
learning how to manifest
Well...it seems I can't sleep. I gave my wife a hard time on the phone because she informed me that our time together next weekend would have to be cut short for a day. Once she arrives I will have not seen her for almost two weeks and it was two weeks before that when we spent time together. I don't mean to be a baby here (but I guess I am). We are newlyweds and have to live apart until May. I had no idea that I would have such a hard time with this. AND...here she is working her ass off to finish law school and I'm being a baby.
So...I can't sleep cause I'm pissed, lonely, and an idiot! I'm sure she doesn't need for me to act this way. I've been trying to be supportive, but today was just not my day for being a good guy.
So...here I am in my stew....thinking about honoring myself and my marriage by trying to manifest some good in my life. My career life has been sucking for some time and it's time to change that. I've spent the last hour coming up with ideas that may help me grow and take some chances, cause the decisions I have made in the past to stay safe have turned into doo doo.
I have tremendous talents...that I am sure of...BUT I can't seem to transform these talents into anything successful. My failures have become my abyss that strangles my soul. THAT has GOT to STOP!!!
Ok...I feel a little better now...I'm going to try and sleep......
So...I can't sleep cause I'm pissed, lonely, and an idiot! I'm sure she doesn't need for me to act this way. I've been trying to be supportive, but today was just not my day for being a good guy.
So...here I am in my stew....thinking about honoring myself and my marriage by trying to manifest some good in my life. My career life has been sucking for some time and it's time to change that. I've spent the last hour coming up with ideas that may help me grow and take some chances, cause the decisions I have made in the past to stay safe have turned into doo doo.
I have tremendous talents...that I am sure of...BUT I can't seem to transform these talents into anything successful. My failures have become my abyss that strangles my soul. THAT has GOT to STOP!!!
Ok...I feel a little better now...I'm going to try and sleep......
Saturday, November 04, 2006
spooky family tree
Seems that genealogy can uncover the identity of haunted spirits. Very interesting....
Check out the below article...Now, THAT is spooky.
*Oct 26, 2006 "Serving The Communities of Boothbay, Boothbay Harbor, Southport, Edgecomb" Vol 129, Number 43
Haunted: The Welch House Inn by Lisa Kristoff
Seasons Greetings…
It is that unique time of year when spirits are high (and sometimes seen), when a leaf dancing across a street on a dark and windy night can make you turn and take in your surroundings with the slightest hint of trepidation.
It is the time of year pumpkins become jack-o-lanterns, when spider webs loom large like those that housed giant arachnids in Elvira's collection of B-horror movies, and when adults and children are transformed into otherworldly personas.
It is the time of year when children bob for apples, when haunted hay rides transport passengers by frightful vignettes, and when Boris Karloff's "Monster Mash" booms from radios and at Halloween parties.
It is also the time of year when ghost stories are told and re-told.
Over the years we have heard about the ghosts on Burnt Island, the Kenniston Hill Inn B&B, and the Opera House at Boothbay Harbor.
This year we have found a new addition to the haunted list, The Welch House Inn. The Welch House Inn is located at 56 McKown Street in Boothbay Harbor and is open year round.
When current owners Susan Hodder and Michael Feldmann purchased the inn four years ago, they were told that a benevolent spirit lodged there.
"I was skeptical," said Hodder. "They told us that housekeepers refused to work alone on the third floor because they experienced uneasy feelings, that objects were moved and that there were unexplained door closings."
And then the mysterious occurrences began.
An antique mantle clock, formerly on the second floor and now moved to the third floor, would begin to chime abruptly - despite the fact that it had never been wound and no key exists to do so…
While visiting his daughter, Hodder's father was standing on the back deck area looking out at the harbor. He turned and looked up at the inn where there are three windows below an inn sign. While looking at the windows he saw the figure of a woman pass by the first, second, and third. And gasped.
To pass by the third window the "woman" would have had to pass through the wall of a room. The third window is located in a hallway…
Housekeeper Tammy Packard has worked at the inn for the last four years. Her contact with the ghost occurred within her first six months of employment.
"It's hard to describe," said Packard. "I just sensed when she was in a room with me."
Packard says that during one "visit" the "woman," told Packard her name was Rebecca.
Packard described her appearance as that of a woman in her late 20s or early 30s. She wears a high-collared garment of stiff fabric with a pink-hued bodice and her dark blonde hair is in a bun.
Packard, who is sensitive to the spirit world, says that Rebecca is lonely; that she had few women friends when she lived at the inn because she was a "forward thinker" desiring more than the expected woman's life.
Kjirsten (K.J.) Barker, an off-season housekeeper, has also seen Rebecca and witnessed unexplained phenomena.
Barker began her employment at the inn in September of 2005. She, too, has sensed "Rebecca's" presence and has heard the chiming clock.
"Sometimes when the clock is chiming the gears are moving and sometimes they are not," Barker said.
According to both Packard and Barker, "Rebecca" favors room seven, but has been in room eight.
It was while she was working in room seven that Barker saw "Rebecca."
"I was cleaning, and standing at the bureau. The mirror on the bureau allows you to see into the hallway," Barker said. "I watched her walk by the room towards the third floor. High-collared dress, dark blonde hair in a ponytail."
No one had ever described "Rebecca's" appearance to Barker, the only difference between the "Rebecca" seen by Packard was the hair…
"The air was electric," recalled Barker.
Another instance occurred while Barker was in room seven emptying the wastebasket. The plastic liner bag suddenly began rolling across the floor, out the door of the room into the hallway and up the floor towards the third floor.
"I ran out calling to Tammy, thinking she was upstairs, but, no one was there," Barker said.
There were no open windows, no drafts. Was the movement of the bag due to the whooshing movement of stiff skirts?
Packard says that in room eight, she turns on the radio that is suddenly changed to the same country station - seemingly on its own.
Both women say that sometimes there are indentations on the beds in rooms seven and eight, as though someone had been seated there.
"Rebecca" most often appears in fall and winter and is very particular about who she appears to. Hodder has never seen her.
However, she does experience the sensation of water droplets falling on her from time to time…
Feldmann, though he does not deny the existence of spirits, has not seen "Rebecca," or had any sense of her.
Hodder's daughter, Leah, has sensed her, but also has not seen her.
"Rebecca" does not frighten the owners and employees of the Welch House. Barker says that she is very welcoming; that the experience is not in the least daunting.
But, who was "Rebecca?" Did a "Rebecca" actually live at the inn?
Intrigued, I decided to do a little investigating.
West Boothbay Harbor resident Jane Carmolli Ribble was a frequent visitor to the residence as a child. It was the home of her great-grandmother, Isabelle Welch Hodgdon.
Ribble had no recollection of having heard anything about a "Rebecca" in the family. Nor, had there ever been any talk of spirits in the house. Still, she offered to check the genealogy and get back to me.
"You are not going to believe this," were Ribble's first words to me after consulting the family tree.
Entered in the book, without a birth year or death year: Rebecca Hodgdon, daughter of Thomas Hodgdon (d. 1805)…
The Boothbay Register headlines
Get the headlines by email:
Boothbay Register Boothbay Harbor, ME Tel: 207.633.4620
http://boothbayregister.maine.com/2006-10-26/haunted_inn.html rev 2006-10-27
*found on the Eastman Online Genealogy Newsletter http://blog.eogn.com/eastmans_online_genealogy/
Check out the below article...Now, THAT is spooky.
*Oct 26, 2006 "Serving The Communities of Boothbay, Boothbay Harbor, Southport, Edgecomb" Vol 129, Number 43
Haunted: The Welch House Inn by Lisa Kristoff
Seasons Greetings…
It is that unique time of year when spirits are high (and sometimes seen), when a leaf dancing across a street on a dark and windy night can make you turn and take in your surroundings with the slightest hint of trepidation.
It is the time of year pumpkins become jack-o-lanterns, when spider webs loom large like those that housed giant arachnids in Elvira's collection of B-horror movies, and when adults and children are transformed into otherworldly personas.
It is the time of year when children bob for apples, when haunted hay rides transport passengers by frightful vignettes, and when Boris Karloff's "Monster Mash" booms from radios and at Halloween parties.
It is also the time of year when ghost stories are told and re-told.
Over the years we have heard about the ghosts on Burnt Island, the Kenniston Hill Inn B&B, and the Opera House at Boothbay Harbor.
This year we have found a new addition to the haunted list, The Welch House Inn. The Welch House Inn is located at 56 McKown Street in Boothbay Harbor and is open year round.
When current owners Susan Hodder and Michael Feldmann purchased the inn four years ago, they were told that a benevolent spirit lodged there.
"I was skeptical," said Hodder. "They told us that housekeepers refused to work alone on the third floor because they experienced uneasy feelings, that objects were moved and that there were unexplained door closings."
And then the mysterious occurrences began.
An antique mantle clock, formerly on the second floor and now moved to the third floor, would begin to chime abruptly - despite the fact that it had never been wound and no key exists to do so…
While visiting his daughter, Hodder's father was standing on the back deck area looking out at the harbor. He turned and looked up at the inn where there are three windows below an inn sign. While looking at the windows he saw the figure of a woman pass by the first, second, and third. And gasped.
To pass by the third window the "woman" would have had to pass through the wall of a room. The third window is located in a hallway…
Housekeeper Tammy Packard has worked at the inn for the last four years. Her contact with the ghost occurred within her first six months of employment.
"It's hard to describe," said Packard. "I just sensed when she was in a room with me."
Packard says that during one "visit" the "woman," told Packard her name was Rebecca.
Packard described her appearance as that of a woman in her late 20s or early 30s. She wears a high-collared garment of stiff fabric with a pink-hued bodice and her dark blonde hair is in a bun.
Packard, who is sensitive to the spirit world, says that Rebecca is lonely; that she had few women friends when she lived at the inn because she was a "forward thinker" desiring more than the expected woman's life.
Kjirsten (K.J.) Barker, an off-season housekeeper, has also seen Rebecca and witnessed unexplained phenomena.
Barker began her employment at the inn in September of 2005. She, too, has sensed "Rebecca's" presence and has heard the chiming clock.
"Sometimes when the clock is chiming the gears are moving and sometimes they are not," Barker said.
According to both Packard and Barker, "Rebecca" favors room seven, but has been in room eight.
It was while she was working in room seven that Barker saw "Rebecca."
"I was cleaning, and standing at the bureau. The mirror on the bureau allows you to see into the hallway," Barker said. "I watched her walk by the room towards the third floor. High-collared dress, dark blonde hair in a ponytail."
No one had ever described "Rebecca's" appearance to Barker, the only difference between the "Rebecca" seen by Packard was the hair…
"The air was electric," recalled Barker.
Another instance occurred while Barker was in room seven emptying the wastebasket. The plastic liner bag suddenly began rolling across the floor, out the door of the room into the hallway and up the floor towards the third floor.
"I ran out calling to Tammy, thinking she was upstairs, but, no one was there," Barker said.
There were no open windows, no drafts. Was the movement of the bag due to the whooshing movement of stiff skirts?
Packard says that in room eight, she turns on the radio that is suddenly changed to the same country station - seemingly on its own.
Both women say that sometimes there are indentations on the beds in rooms seven and eight, as though someone had been seated there.
"Rebecca" most often appears in fall and winter and is very particular about who she appears to. Hodder has never seen her.
However, she does experience the sensation of water droplets falling on her from time to time…
Feldmann, though he does not deny the existence of spirits, has not seen "Rebecca," or had any sense of her.
Hodder's daughter, Leah, has sensed her, but also has not seen her.
"Rebecca" does not frighten the owners and employees of the Welch House. Barker says that she is very welcoming; that the experience is not in the least daunting.
But, who was "Rebecca?" Did a "Rebecca" actually live at the inn?
Intrigued, I decided to do a little investigating.
West Boothbay Harbor resident Jane Carmolli Ribble was a frequent visitor to the residence as a child. It was the home of her great-grandmother, Isabelle Welch Hodgdon.
Ribble had no recollection of having heard anything about a "Rebecca" in the family. Nor, had there ever been any talk of spirits in the house. Still, she offered to check the genealogy and get back to me.
"You are not going to believe this," were Ribble's first words to me after consulting the family tree.
Entered in the book, without a birth year or death year: Rebecca Hodgdon, daughter of Thomas Hodgdon (d. 1805)…
The Boothbay Register headlines
Get the headlines by email:
Boothbay Register Boothbay Harbor, ME Tel: 207.633.4620
http://boothbayregister.maine.com/2006-10-26/haunted_inn.html rev 2006-10-27
*found on the Eastman Online Genealogy Newsletter http://blog.eogn.com/eastmans_online_genealogy/
Friday, November 03, 2006
to grunt or not to grunt....that is the question
every issue is complicated...BUT...
The following article found on comcast's website shows how gyms have become unwelcome for bodybuilders. This normally would not be such a big deal, but gyms that used to be available to bodybuilders have become harder and harder to find. Depending on your income status, they may be unobtainable completely IF you can find one.
Yes...the guy was probably grunting too loudly, but wouldn't a simple warning suffice.
I don't have time now, but later I would like to discuss both sides of the coin. I consider myself an amateur bodybuilder. Understanding the different types of bodybuilders is important here and much judgement and prejudges exists. Some of it deserved and some not.
For now here is the article:
Grunting Carries No Weight in This Gym
By CANDICE CHOI, Associated Press Writer
Thu Nov 2, 6:59 PM
ALBANY, N.Y. - Some gyms forbid hogging machines and or wearing flip flops. At one gym, grunting is grounds for expulsion. Albert Argibay of Beacon, N.Y. was escorted by police officers from a gym this week for grunting _ which is against Planet Fitness' rules for maintaining a non-intimidating atmosphere.
"Perhaps I grunted, perhaps I didn't. It's open to interpretation," said Argibay, a 40-year-old corrections officer. He said he had his headset on when he was lifting 500 pounds on a squat machine at the gym in Wappingers Falls, about 80 miles north of New York City.
Planet Fitness, which has 120 locations across the country, markets itself as a place where anyone can feel comfortable in its "Judgment Free Zone."
Its rules, posted around the gym, state members cannot wear bandanas, grunt or bang weights on the ground. When an offender is spotted, a "lunk alarm" sounds to warn the member.
Across its locations nationwide, there is at least one expulsion every two weeks, said Mike Grondahl, CEO of Planet Fitness. He said grunting and dropping weights are the most common offenses.
"When somebody's in there and they grunt and they grunt loud, it's trying to bring attention to themselves to show everyone how strong they are," Grondahl said.
Argibay emitted the offending grunt Monday evening, a peak time for gyms, said Carol Palazzolo, the gym's general manager. She said she heard it from across the room, even though "the place was a zoo."
"He was looking directly at me and he did it four times," she said. "I'm not a doctor, but as far as I know, a grunt is a noise that comes out of one's body that is loud and is intimidating."
An argument ensued when she confronted him, and the police were called. Argibay was escorted out, but no charges were filed.
"It's an embarrassing situation to be in, over a grunt," Argibay said.
Most clubs have policies regarding proper gym manners, although expulsions are rare, said Brooke Correia, spokeswoman for the International Health, Racquet and Sportsclub Association.
Grunting might be more taboo in gyms like Planet Fitness, which cater to exercise novices, Correia said.
The heaviest dumb bells at Planet Fitness are 80 pounds, meaning it's a place geared toward the general public, Palazzolo said.
She didn't know if Argibay was a chronic offender _ he'd only been a member since Sept. 27. But it was the first time she kicked a member out for grunting.
"I don't know the reason behind grunting or not grunting. But if you need to grunt, you may go and join another gym," she said.
The following article found on comcast's website shows how gyms have become unwelcome for bodybuilders. This normally would not be such a big deal, but gyms that used to be available to bodybuilders have become harder and harder to find. Depending on your income status, they may be unobtainable completely IF you can find one.
Yes...the guy was probably grunting too loudly, but wouldn't a simple warning suffice.
I don't have time now, but later I would like to discuss both sides of the coin. I consider myself an amateur bodybuilder. Understanding the different types of bodybuilders is important here and much judgement and prejudges exists. Some of it deserved and some not.
For now here is the article:
Grunting Carries No Weight in This Gym
By CANDICE CHOI, Associated Press Writer
Thu Nov 2, 6:59 PM
ALBANY, N.Y. - Some gyms forbid hogging machines and or wearing flip flops. At one gym, grunting is grounds for expulsion. Albert Argibay of Beacon, N.Y. was escorted by police officers from a gym this week for grunting _ which is against Planet Fitness' rules for maintaining a non-intimidating atmosphere.
"Perhaps I grunted, perhaps I didn't. It's open to interpretation," said Argibay, a 40-year-old corrections officer. He said he had his headset on when he was lifting 500 pounds on a squat machine at the gym in Wappingers Falls, about 80 miles north of New York City.
Planet Fitness, which has 120 locations across the country, markets itself as a place where anyone can feel comfortable in its "Judgment Free Zone."
Its rules, posted around the gym, state members cannot wear bandanas, grunt or bang weights on the ground. When an offender is spotted, a "lunk alarm" sounds to warn the member.
Across its locations nationwide, there is at least one expulsion every two weeks, said Mike Grondahl, CEO of Planet Fitness. He said grunting and dropping weights are the most common offenses.
"When somebody's in there and they grunt and they grunt loud, it's trying to bring attention to themselves to show everyone how strong they are," Grondahl said.
Argibay emitted the offending grunt Monday evening, a peak time for gyms, said Carol Palazzolo, the gym's general manager. She said she heard it from across the room, even though "the place was a zoo."
"He was looking directly at me and he did it four times," she said. "I'm not a doctor, but as far as I know, a grunt is a noise that comes out of one's body that is loud and is intimidating."
An argument ensued when she confronted him, and the police were called. Argibay was escorted out, but no charges were filed.
"It's an embarrassing situation to be in, over a grunt," Argibay said.
Most clubs have policies regarding proper gym manners, although expulsions are rare, said Brooke Correia, spokeswoman for the International Health, Racquet and Sportsclub Association.
Grunting might be more taboo in gyms like Planet Fitness, which cater to exercise novices, Correia said.
The heaviest dumb bells at Planet Fitness are 80 pounds, meaning it's a place geared toward the general public, Palazzolo said.
She didn't know if Argibay was a chronic offender _ he'd only been a member since Sept. 27. But it was the first time she kicked a member out for grunting.
"I don't know the reason behind grunting or not grunting. But if you need to grunt, you may go and join another gym," she said.
Wednesday, November 01, 2006
evaluations
Well...I didn't get the job and I was not even considered. Seems that my fast departure had too much of a negative reaction. I have to believe it is for the best as the job would have been exhausting and poor paying, but in the field that I dream of working in.
Onward...tough day today...seems that mercury is in retrograde and causing issues for me. My house was egged late on Halloween, so I spent and hour cleaning up that mess today. The dial that registers the oil on my car is stuck all the way to the right. My car hood won't stay shut. Shall I go on.....
So...I'm going to bed now and cover my head and hope for a better day tomorrow....
Onward...tough day today...seems that mercury is in retrograde and causing issues for me. My house was egged late on Halloween, so I spent and hour cleaning up that mess today. The dial that registers the oil on my car is stuck all the way to the right. My car hood won't stay shut. Shall I go on.....
So...I'm going to bed now and cover my head and hope for a better day tomorrow....
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